I groggily reach for my phone to check the time, and when I notice how late it is, I mouth a mild expletive and hop out of bed, racing to the kids’ room to begin my daily role of drill sergeant. I bark orders to get them up, motivated, and out the door with all their necessary belongings. On time.

Apparently I hit the snooze button one too many times.

Again.

Even the best routines get derailed, especially when stress silences that tiny voice inside my head that’s begging for structure and order. Luckily, I’ve found a few things I can do to help me coast during those times.

Think ahead

Something as simple as laying out clothes for the kids (and myself) the night before, or making tomorrow’s lunches while I’m already cooking dinner have proven invaluable. While I always intend to wake up early enough to do all these things in the morning, it’s nice having a safety net.

Take care of you

When I’m stressed, I often let myself go. It’s usually something small, like throwing on a hat instead of styling my hair, or opting for sweats instead of something more flattering. Whatever the case, when I take a little extra time to care for and groom myself, I feel much better.

Breathe, stretch, shake—and let it go

Are you agonizing about whether or not you’re the parent you want to be? You are wasting valuable time. Instead, spend time DOING the things you’d like to do better or more often. Whenever you feel guilt setting in, focus that energy on a plan of action instead.

There’s no such thing as a perfect parent, but if you’re trying, you’re amazing—and that’s more than enough!